G’day world. Like an Eclipse mint sandwich is the freshly worded weekly wash keeping you informed with all the surf happenings locally and what has been happening on the pro tour.
A dreary week was bestowed upon us, a week so wet it would moisten the dry humour out of Paul Hogan, but it did supply us all with copious amounts of surf which was a treat.
Regardless of how ugly, yuck or foul the outside weather is, as long as the waves are there it could be paradise to us demented surfers.
A solid south-east swell came and laid upon us for a solid four-day period, which also had some flavorsome winds, giving it more appeal than a flannelette shirt and a pair of gumboots to a dairy farmer.
The swell was prevalent all week and although his body was starting to seize up, a little like a rusty hinge that hasn't seen WD40 in 30 years, this didn't stop Paul Burton from stroking out late on Sunday afternoon at Collars Reef.
A big arvo shove from the east muscled its way into the bay and although the north-east wind picked up and started to blow an onshore breeze the waves were still extremely fun.
Paul, who suffered an extremely gnarly wipe out in Fiji a few years ago, will tell you he has lost a little bit of confidence in the bigger waves.
You would never have guessed it though as he tackled some of the bigger waves of the afternoon.
He skimmed down the face of the wave then sucking up the walls like a kid slurping up spaghetti.
After a few successful six foot plus rides he left the ocean feeling a little more at ease with the water when it packs a punch
Speaking of packing a punch, Crystals roared alive during the swell and Jesse Bradford heard its call.
With a swing to the east the fabled wave offered up some mountainous peaks which resembled that of Sunset Beach, Hawaii, except all the surfers were clad head to toe in thick neoprene instead of lightweight board shorts.
Jesse though, paddled out like he was in shorts anyway and paddled into some dreamy peaks where he toyed with the beastly wave, which offers more power than a D volt battery plugged into your toothbrush.
After scooping up some of the bigger sets of the day, Jesse retired to the beach and put on another formidable display as he destroyed three bacon and egg burgers in a row.
The J-Bay Open 2016 reached the semifinals, at Jeffreys Bay, South Africa.
Kelly Slater continues to showcase his experience in waves of consequence.
He beat Michel Bourez and Alejo Muniz in round four, and advanced directly to the quarterfinals.
Slater is a serious contender to win here for the fifth time.
Mick Fanning also earned a spot in the quarterfinals.
The Australian did what he had to do to defeat Wiggolly Dantas and Adriano de Souza.
John “John” Florence is the first semi-finalist. The Hawaiian surfer defeated the local star Jordy Smith in challenging three-to-four-foot waves.
Florence won the heat by a very narrow margin - 0.20 points. Florence said it was was tough out there and was stoked to make it through.
Stay classy Milton Ulladulla and if you would like to add to this column email kurt@akwasurf.com.au.
Till next week, stay wet.
